Average Joe and Cop

Average Joe: (opens the car’s window and screams freely) Nobody knows how mysterious and frightening I really am.
Cop: (stops his car) We know everything. You know what I mean!
Average Joe: I am too busy to answer your questions.
Cop: What do you mean that you are too busy to answer all of my questions?
Average Joe: Young Man! Don’t set a line you can’t delete.
Cop: You are setting it first, and you know it.
Average Joe: (shrugs carelessly) And, now you must know who is escorting me even if it is a cat.
Cop: (eyes the cat differently) Is the cat wearing something that I need to know about, like some special collar.
Average Joe: Whatever!
Cop: Oh what a golden one! (sings to the cat) The world is less compared to your beauty. Every time I gaze at you, I stall and become lost. Verily! you are unmatched.
Average Joe: (feels mildly surprised at Cop’s statements about his cat) You don’t say…
Cop: You can go now. Go straight, take a right, and then a left. The rest of the roads here are broken. (yawns)
Average Joe: (teases) Umm! What if I don’t want to go now.
Cop: Excuse me!
Average Joe: I just wanna know why you are dropping lines at my cat?
Cop: This man is senile. Fine! I must tell you that I just reimbursed myself by taking your cat’s golden collar, and there is nothing much you can do about this. Now, stop kidding me and get out.
Average Joe: (states assertively) You get out first.
Cop: I guess this man wants a panda from a cop who forgot his rifle at home. Ah! I hope it’s not the “salute of the dead” for me.
Average Joe: (tries to step out of his car)
Cop: You cannot get out. Keep your hands on the wheel.
Average Joe: (whistles really hard)
Cop: (slowly sees a black thing climbing on his face)
Average Joe: (whispers to himself) The collar had the right stuff.
Cop: (falls down and almost falls asleep)
Average Joe: (laughs and drives) I wonder what I will steal from my Chemistry lab next time.
Cop: (blurches drowsily) I will tail you.
Average Joe: (screams through the car’s window) I will leave my cat’s collar here as evidence that you took it from me without asking my permission. I have recorded everything because I am wearing spy cameras on my fingers and hat, around my neck, and on my belly button.
Cop: (deduces) This leads to that and that leads to you know what (falls asleep like a spoiled baby)
Average Joe: (finally farts like a newborn). Who cares!
Cop: (screams like an angry girl) My life and career has been destroyed over something so little. This guy has no shame at all.
Average Joe: My fart can walk a tight rope and it can stay inside this room…I mean car for really long.

Copyright © by Arzoo Zaheer. All Rights Reserved.

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