There is something very poisonous about the atmosphere that is present inside some Canadian academic organizations and workplaces. I feel that some Canadians and even International students are very much used to picking on non-White women. I have come across some mature students who intentionally attempt to degrade others over really little things. They triangulate in such an insensitive manner that one feels at loss and is unable to complain properly. For instance, I was harassed in a group setting by a couple of professionals just some while ago. As usual, they triangulated me over very minor things. I have blocked those who started or participated in this mistreatment.
When these people do these things, they do not realize that 1) they are dealing with mature students who are handling a very heavy workload; and, 2) triangulating or gaslighting someone is unhealthy because it removes victim’s psychological safety. We actually studied importance of psychological safety in this program; but, I have noticed that some students are using extreme force to remove this notion from my mind. Before I proceed, I must comment that Canada’s current environment offers tremendous insecurity to colored female professionals.
This entire argument revolves around something seemingly insignificant: left alignment or justification. I was asked to shed some light on this concept several times by the same group members; and, I always told them that my Canadian teachers have taught me to always align paragraphs to the left. I explained this to them once; and, then after some days or perhaps a month or so, I was locked in another confrontation about this. I felt very violated due to all of this! Apparently, one of the group members was somehow still uncomfortable about aligning text to the left; as soon as the other team members heard this comment, they started asking for a veto on this. I just stared at their faces in disbelief! Obviously, I took a stand against this all but the non-White woman—some non-White Canadians and International students also fully participate in the abuse of well meaning colored professionals because doing so helps them fit in—who started this unnecessary conversation later called me “Professor”. Mind you! She said this to me after I was requested to share my ideas/thoughts with the group and during a situation that required deeper analysis. For instance, look at the nature of this situation. I had to email this group a couple of links where it was stated that left alignment is preferred because it is easier to read this way. It is easier to notice now that the word “Professor” was only used to shame and humiliate me further.
There are more and more such incidences that are taking place in Canada. A lot of time, victims may choose not to take any measure against such abuse. Other times, the abusers and those who are watching try to minimize the entire reality; for example, nobody addressed the negative effects of such tactics after this incidence. If you are feeling confused about what actually happened, then know that the request to veto on an issue that was previously discussed and agreed upon is an example of triangulation and gaslighting.
These confusing methods of communication finally created an argument by pushing me to state the same fact over and over again. Soon after graduation, I remembered a comment that was issued by a friend of mine—I forgot this due to the narcissistic abuse I was facing. You see, a friend of mine once told me that narcissistic moves can cause victims to apologize for things they should not feel sorry about. I also read into another speaker’s life story and found out that he has learned from experience that if someone is not taking a good stance to protect oneself, then the rest are just going to keep crushing that person. This is when I decided to block this woman and some other students who I felt were causing some issues. I am still in touch with group members who were considerate and wise enough to read into the real situation and react properly.
I don’t feel sad disclosing this here although I feel very forced to do this. I am doing this because I have heard some other very severe complaints of abuse that some non-White professionals and students are facing inside some Canadian Event Management companies.
One such company whose employees participated in harassing me is based in Ottawa. I am not sharing the name here because I don’t wish to be harassed any further and I am afraid of being blackmailed. I was working in volunteer capacity; a new hire, S, mistreated me and then contorted the entire situation to ignore the fact that my other trainer L gave me a different set of instructions; this incidence was formally reported to the college that placed me with this company as well as the company itself; and, a detailed email was sent to company’s CEO who failed to take measures to effectively review this situation. I have copies of all the emails. Know that, nothing much was done about this—I would have loved to receive a formal apology.
I know that Canada needs to turn things around before its too late. Workplace harassment is on rise; and, I know that many people are deserting workplaces due to this. Read “Violence and Harassment in the Workplaces on the Rise“.
I do not feel sad walking away even though I did make friends with these people; but, I am willing to give myself time to recover from this shock. It is true that in Canada, non-White female professionals are mistreated at every level; and, they are at strong risk of having their character, memory, performance, and future jeopardized. I keep saying that Canada has something to do with this because those who are supposed to take action against such oppression are not doing anything. For example, it has come to my attention that even some clinical faculty members of a particular nursing college, which is based in Ontario, are participating in psychologically torturing talented students by closing their complaints without a fair trial/investigation. If you do not believe me, read Simona Chiose’s article, “Justice on Campus“; Sana Halwani’s article “Racial inequality in access to health care services“; University of Manitoba’s Associate Professor Brenda L Gunn’s article “Ignored to Death: Systemic Racism in the Canadian Healthcare System“; Robyn Maynard’s article “Canadian Education is Steeped in Anti-Black Racism” (its the same for Brown people like me); RNAO’s position statement “Violence Against Nurses: ‘Zero Tolerance’ For Violence Against Nurses and Nursing Students“; and, Gary Stevenson ‘s article “Violence and Harassment in the Workplaces on the Rise“.
I must comment that gaslighting was done in such a manner that I still feel a little confused. As a result, I am putting a reminder here for myself and everyone else. Read Detective James L. Trainum’s book “How the Police Generate False Confessions: An Inside Look at the Interrogation Room”; and, you will see how the police creates informants and criminals by lying to them in a group setting. I think what is happening inside some Canadian workplaces including the academic ones is nothing different than what is noted in this book.
Before I leave you with your thoughts, I must make you note that I am not doing anything of this for publicity or money. Know that I am a Lucid Dreamer; I can move forward in time; and, I have successfully documented all of this here on my blog. I know that I can get very famous just by discussing my creative dreams. Think about it! I don’t have any motive for lying about this abuse. Why do I need to type all this other stuff about being abused? I mean it takes time to write these posts; research and add relevant articles; and, then it takes some more time to reach out to influential speakers/figures who might be able to take some action. Please! Think about how they are trying to destroy me and the rest!
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