These are tips that I have learned while learning how to move forward from abusive workplaces or relationships.
- Give yourself time. Go slow. Do not rush or do something rash.
- Listen to your close friends or those who are going through similar hardships.
- Express yourself genuinely by sharing with trustworthy folks or writing about it.
- Take prescription medication if necessary. In my case, I was able to move forward without medication because I know how to use lucid dreams and because I chose to drink recommended does of Aloe Vera Whole Leaf juice instead.
- Make genuine friends, both males and females. Don’t cut someone from your friendship circle due to gender because opposite gender knows a lot of helpful things that your gender don’t know. Connecting with members of the opposite gender should help you relate well to your needs as well, which can help you realize your weaknesses and strengths in a safe manner.
- Sleep for at least 8 hours routinely.
- Exercise regularly.
- Distract yourself by enrolling in a program or a course.
- Find a hobby.
- Help someone else out through social media or by meeting in real life. This should help you take mind off your worries.
- Use lucid dreaming techniques to sleep better. You can visit a whole lot of places by using dreams. I love it when my dreams let me ride in aeroplanes or helicopters. I can do this all for free. Do you have any idea how that feels!
- If you are not married or not in a relationship, then try lucid dream sex. It improves mood and helps you become more focused. I am Muslim; and, I definitely engage in Lucid Dream sex. Do not feel that doing so will somehow break your personal boundaries because it can’t do that. Dream characters are very smart and sensitive entities. If your mind wanders in doubt about this, the dreams will disappear on their own. This is why in Islam we are told that “the pen is lifted while one is asleep“.
- Block negative thoughts by distracting yourself.
- Learn abusers’ mentality and don’t add anyone of that sort in your close circle of friends. Read “Regeneration“.
- Meditate in a safe place. Close your eyes. Breath in and out until you are relaxed. Now think of your favourite person or best memory. Imagine you are rowing towards that person or memory.
- Forgive and forget. If you are having trouble forgiving, then do something constructive such as build a support group or write a book about your experience. Forgetting is easy!
- Enjoy your favourite activity. For me, playing with nature is very important. I spend a lot of time in the Water Park during summer. Martial Arts is also very important for me because I can think more clearly this way. So, no matter how hard or different this activity seems to you after the abuse, still do it.
- Listen to music but don’t overdo this. Manage your urge to listen to too much music.
- Don’t watch too much TV. Do exercise or dancing instead to feel good.
- You will become hazy if your trauma hits you back. Manage your time well. I use alarms to wake up; I have an agenda book at home and a smaller one in my purse; and, I use the Eisenhower Matrix to prioritize my tasks.
All these activities should help you manage your self-esteem, confidence, mood, and morale. If you did all of these, then moving forward should be easy. Trust me! this gets easier over time.
Copyright © by Arzoo Zaheer. All Rights Reserved.