If you feel that you are being isolated from a group by a couple of people—it is possible that they are your loved family members or close friends—who could also be your friends, then it is time to walk away from them. My experiences have shown me that dysfunctional families function like a cult. There is always one person almost everyone follows more. Within a family, it is easy to brainwash people because sometimes all you have to do is make somebody just sit in their room all day.
There are many hard-to-notice ways of isolating someone who is close to the abuser(s). One way is to constantly group with others and neglect the victim. Another method is to point fingers to the victim so that he/she may start feeling disconnected. Picking fights with the victim during travel is also a very popular method because the victim is already been considerably isolated from his/her usual setting. Telling the victim that he/she is forcing suffering upon himself/herself by boycotting the rest helps abusers showcase the victim as “ugly duckling” who is very unfit.
The same set of mind games apply to the Muslim families who are dysfunctional in nature but fail to acknowledge this issue. Remember its easier for the Muslims to hide that they are abusing someone because they can easily go around pretending to be religious. I myself have witnessed a Muslim man who used to beat his kids at home and then pray five times and fast throughout Ramadan like nothing happened. I have also witnessed how young Muslims walk away from prayers simply because within an abusive household, prayers can be considered as a type of Activity Pedagogy, which is designed to brainwash people—if they are walking away in such a setting, then they are probably really smart. Also in some households that are chronically ill, methods of abuse don’t stop but evolve. For example, all Muslims are aware of right of education and job. When the victim was young, he/she was being abused by the relatives who attempted to prevent and discourage him/her from having a job. But, when the victim grew older, he/she was told to hold a job but then isolated in other ways such as victim blaming or silent treatments. Do you see now why it is tough to point out to an abuser who just happens to be a “practicing” Muslim? Same applies to people belonging to other faiths who appear righteous and caring to outsiders.
Read article “Top 10 Brainwashing Techniques” to learn about more brainwashing techniques. If you are being abused at home, then you can create your checklist about tactics that have been used on you so far. Trust me! Its better to realize that you are being brainwashed and reprogrammed and not grown properly than to just ignore this painful fact. Victims of abuse don’t like to admit this because they don’t know the next step in their lives. Teaming up with another victim of abuse or almost anyone from within your community will help you voyage appropriately within this “new and truer world”.
Copyright © by Arzoo Zaheer. All Rights Reserved.