Note: I am sharing this here because a lot of times Muslims are portrayed as dull and boring people who lack the intellect to do creative things like falling in or out of love. The mainstream media has played a big role in twisting the image of the Muslims—even historical acts that were issued to demonstrate kindness and love have been manipulated as something evil. Storytelling is a powerful tool for helping people visualize the reality, which is why I am sharing a very private part of my life with my readers.
To me, falling in love feels like a real heart attack. I am even in love with some of my dream characters. How much do you think I love my loved ones with whom I interact on daily basis?
Once I fell in love with this Belgian Muslim revert (convert)—I was around 25 years old back then. I still distinctly remember feeling very anxious about things going the right way for both of us; I still recall I used to keep his picture at my workplace and used to hold it when I was stressed; and, I distinctly recollect even considering elopement if we needed to. He was also very much in love with me; and, I could tell that this was the case because he used to pay a lot of attention to me. He was Dyslexic, which means that he was extremely fast in certain tasks. We used to play Chess for hours; and, he used to beat me in seconds. I loved to write; and, he loved to edit my stuff and offer advice. I wrote this poem for him, “In Love, They Waited Patiently“—at the time I wrote this poem, I had already decided that I will eventually marry him. Reality is that we considered ourselves engaged to each other although there was no official ceremony for this. It was a long distance relationship so most of the time, we connected online. Despite all our efforts, things did not work out as we expected; and, so we did not get married. We took our time before we made the final decision; I was engaged with him for a couple of years. Even after making my decision to move forward, I worried a lot for him. Thus, I prayed for his well-being; and, today I am still grateful to God that he successfully married another woman and created his family. As for my intriguing mental state…well, it disappeared on its own over time.
All this was quite an experience! I strongly feel that God allowed this relationship to occur because getting him distracted by me would have kept him chaste, which is what he really wanted compared to what other women were offering him. He was still a new revert (convert); and, I was still learning how to fall in love and whom to marry. The fact that both of us worked on ourselves and never made any physical contact still shines in my mind as evidence of our dedication to our religion Islam regardless of what we felt towards each other. He was safer with me, which is why God made us stick around for long until we both matured enough to figure out our next steps.
So what I went through can be explained with the help of this article:
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